What if showing up is the most impactful way to align with life’s flow?
Showing up for the ride on a foggy day in the mountains
Sitting outside having a coffee the other day, a woman stopped right in front of me with her pram, smiled trustingly, and asked me to watch her toddler while she went inside.
Shortly after, a man with a dog tossed the leash of his companion into the hands of two girls sitting beside me, and vanished inside, while “his name is Henry, by the way” echoed out the door.
Not long after, I exchanged an unguarded smile with a woman radiating effortless beauty through her freckled, lively face—a connection forged for a split second as our eyes met in the day's hustle.
This succession of moments drifting by reminded me that trust is built by trusting. It was this bubbly energy of helping each other along, without doubting our capacity for the task on our shared human journey.
It’s about showing up for what life is asking of us in the moment, without letting our fear-driven defenses get in the way.
And while we are often asked to show up in fiercely demanding ways—for family, friends, work, or health challenges—it’s those off-the-record moments that can carry us when we are about to run out of steam. It's like that brief, knowing smile of a colleague that helps push through the final hour of an exhausting workshop.
About Showing Up Anyway
Showing up is about building the muscle to carry on with the most mundane practice, even when we feel uninspired. It’s about doing it anyway, despite doubting the impact.
It’s about engaging with those mornings when you truly wonder if you can show up for the day at all. Those mornings where there is a sense of nauseousness ahead of challenging meetings, a difficult doctor's appointment, or the seemingly endless repetition of caring for kids or elders at an excruciatingly slow pace.
Yet, this is the most impactful choice we get to make every moment:
Do we open up or close off? Do we enable or restrict the flow? Do we expand our energy by leaning in or clamp up as we frenetically worry about our reserves?
I’ve repeatedly put on my running shoes listlessly, only to find myself propelling into unexpected enjoyment, gaining energy as I went along.
My Yoga teacher friend once told me she counts just lying on her mat as showing up on a day she can’t bring herself to practice, which usually leads to a few restorative stretches.
The pragmatic mom of a childhood friend used to point out: "If you don't feel like doing something, you just start off without feeling like doing it." While we felt it had a tough edge, she had a point.
Showing up for something may result in it not working out how we hoped, but not showing up guarantees there is no chance for a result at all.
Why It Matters: The Unexpected Power of Consistency
Jessica Long, the accomplished Paralympic swimmer, pointed out that "some of the most successful people are those who just keep starting."
It’s about starting anew, on repeat—whether you’re sitting at your desk, triggering an exercise routine by enabling the environment, or practicing your instrument even for a few minutes daily.
Similarly, the great marathoner Eliud Kipchoge, who broke the two-hour mark, emphasizes consistency. When people interview him hoping for some magic advice, he often stresses there are no shortcuts. It's simply about putting in the miles, day in and day out.
The legendary director Steven Spielberg is famously quoted on the power of persistence: "You just show up. And you just stay." His ethos of being present on set, even before being fully accepted, points to how creativity reliably reaches out when we show up with clear intention to be the vessel for the work that wants to be expressed.
Often when sitting at my laptop, I literally write the hesitation away as I type along. It’s the thinking that usually gets in the way, while the writing itself clears the path.
This is why journaling your way out of feeling cornered by life works so efficiently. The cocktail of emotions, confusion, doubt, or insecurity is released as you literally write it out of your system. In moments of urgent despair, I find it works best to write by hand, letting the movement of the pen flow, irrelevant if you can re-read it. It’s as if the tension gets released with the flow of the ink.
A famous Zen teaching suggests that "The path establishes itself as we walk it." It’s a reminder that we don't need to see the entire route or feel ready to begin. On the contrary, accepting that we will never be perfectly prepared seems to be the way. It’s a bit like riding on the train backwards: we are present for where we are, seeing what we passed blur away, but we can't see where we're going before we get there.
Gaining Momentum On The Go
Have you ever noticed how that walk you dreaded turns out to be okay or even invigorating, once you cross the threshold of taking the first step?
Do you remember that party you really didn't want to attend only to find yourself having a great time? That book you avoided forever, not being able to put it down once you got past the first page?
Through frequently moving, I’ve learned to wait it out when arriving at an established scene. The task is to show up regardless of the uneasy feelings that come with being an outsider to established rules. It’s about going to that new local coffee spot again and again, nodding to the people you recognize, to one day suddenly be treated as if you have belonged there all along.
Engaging with something consistently usually reaches a tipping point when we show the stamina to carry on beyond our impatience for immediate results.
It’s as if life reciprocates the energy of determination we bring to the moment, if we don't throw in the towel the second we flinch in doubt.
Similarly, creativity reaches out reliably when we show up with clear intention to be the vessel for the picture that wants to be painted, or the lines wanting to be written. It’s as if we trigger the flow of ever-present creativity by how trustingly we offer our attention.
As Henri Matisse pointed out, "Inspiration comes while working, not before."
We make space for serendipity to the degree that we are paying attention to where we are.
Showing Up Beyond Predictable Outcomes
The mechanism of showing up despite any guarantee for a specific result was crucial for my dad when recovering from his coma and loss of physical and mental capacities.
We credit his life-long practice routine as a musician for helping him endure a gruelingly slow process of daily exercises, even when told there was no certainty for recovery. He mentioned at some point that he had simply decided to show up for the day, even if he didn’t understand where he was heading. It was my masterclass in cultivating resilience against all odds in the face of uncertainty.
It’s taught me the power of releasing the need for proof before a process has run its course, and instead, working with life as it stands.
What if your power lies in showing up with clarity of intention instead of clarity of a set idea?
What if the quality of our work is more dependent on our presence than a mapped-out plan?
What if our relationships depend more on our presence than on what we say or do?
This is the reason being fully present without offering solutions to an excruciating experience a friend is going through can have the biggest impact. It’s about acknowledging that the best way to communicate can at times be to say nothing while wholeheartedly offering your undivided presence.
Showing Up for Yourself: The Self-Care Pivot
While consistent engagement is key, it's vital to discern between momentary discomfort and a genuine need for rest. Walking that tightrope when gauging our energy is what showing up for yourself truly comes down to.
Showing up for yourself is about respecting your current capacity to "perform." When you notice persistent fatigue, decreased productivity, increased irritability, or a loss of enthusiasm for tasks you usually enjoy, it might be time to show up for a break.
It can look like saying No to a chore to say Yes to yourself. It can be declining an invitation to respect your need for alone time—the most crucial connection you will ever have. It’s about making space for yourself: space for that nap, space for your mind to unwind from all the outer input, space for your body to breathe deeply when you find yourself wound tight from having engaged too intensely with the world.
Rather than being selfish, as it might appear, showing up for yourself is the most crucial way to show up better for your surroundings.
It’s about relating skillfully with those your path crosses to the degree that you know yourself intimately.
Showing up for yourself is about living by your own rules of engagement with agency, rather than getting dragged along by external agendas.
It’s about gaining trust that your task is to live the life meant for you, not merely be an extra in someone else's story.
Gentle reminder: Taking a strategic time-out to regain clarity and adjusting your approach doesn't mean you're giving up; rather, it’s a way to ensure long-term sustainability when giving into life fully.
The Relief of Open-Ended Engagement
When I was growing up daily practice was a non-negotiable routine. It accustomed me to see practice as way of living, not something I had to feel enthralled with every time – which I definitely didn’t.
On the flip side, this removed the pressure that it had to provide extraordinary results every time, which it definitely didn't either.
It taught me the power of showing up for its own sake, rather than it being a means to a defined end.
Throughout my life, I've realized how this approach extended beyond the piano to workouts, corporate jobs, and creative tasks, as much as to facing the day with curiosity over rigid expectations.
I’m not suggesting we shouldn't have goals, but I question if the way to reach them is less intimidating—and ultimately more likely—if we engage with the process detached from insisting on a specific outcome.
It’s about flipping the script by writing our own story on the go instead of following a pre-set manual based on predefined expectations you have mortgaged yourself to.
Ultimately, showing up is about clocking opportunities through the awareness you give each offer.
It’s about the power of bringing yourself with full attention to the encounter life is inviting you into.
Your core job is to bring your whole, curious self to the moment, trusting that life will take care of the rest.
Ask yourself
What if you exchanged all the complex mental gymnastics you get yourself tangled up in with the wisdom of 80 percent of success merely being about showing up, as the saying goes?
What do you show up for regardless? How does it affect your life?
Is there something you're willing to engage in with endless repetition?